Christmas Presents or Christmas Presence?

by SSJ Associate Stephanie Hall 

I recall when my now adult son was preschool age and, as a family, we attended the Christmas Eve children’s Mass at our parish. We often sat up front as it helped hold our children’s attention. A young, newly ordained priest was celebrating his first Christmas Eve Mass, and at one point, when he was prefacing a prayer, he referenced “Christ’s presence.” My son was definitely paying attention because, without hesitation, he turned to me and shouted (loudly), “PRESENTS?????” Everyone laughed and reacted as you would expect to this young boy’s innocent response that reflected his anticipation of what was coming the following day. That story remains a special memory, and I’ve shared it many times. Reflecting on it more than 20 years later brings new meaning.

The word presents is what grabbed my son’s attention. But it’s the word presence that has grown in meaning and significance for me. A slight change in spelling makes a huge difference. Presence is the act of being present, being in tune with the moment, attentive to what is happening now, not what happened in the past or what might happen in the future.

I heard someone refer to Advent as being about the past and the prophecies of Jesus that have come to fruition and about the future, anticipating when Christ will come again. What’s missing in that description is the now—the present moment. We are often so focused on what has already happened or what might happen that we don’t experience what is happening. This keeps us from being present and offering our presence.

​This is especially true this time of year. In the midst of all the preparations, we can be with someone, and yet be a million miles away, thinking of all there is to do. Have you ever sat through Christmas Eve Mass thinking about what had yet to get done or mentally reviewing the Christmas menu? Did you miss the present moment?

Maybe that was the real meaning of my son’s exclamation. Maybe he was really saying “PRESENCE.” Maybe it was God’s way of getting my attention. It did.

Are you experiencing the presence of Advent? Are you offering your presence to those you are with? Remember, we are spiritual BE-ings, not spiritual DO-ings. This Advent and Christmas season, when there is so much emphasis on presents, think about a slight change in spelling and make it more about presence.

Focus on being present, rather than giving a present. Being present, our presence, ​is the best present we can give.